Dear Army Chief,

You have written a direct missive to the prime minister superceding your defence minister. The broad contents of the letter reportedly are:
 
1. Your army’s entire tank fleet is “devoid of critical ammunition to defeat enemy tanks”.
2. Air defence is 97% obsolete.
3. Air defence doesn't give deemed confidence to protect.
4. Infantry is crippled with “deficiencies of crew served weapon”.
5. Infantry lacks “night fighting” capabilities.
6. Elite special forces are “woefully short” of “essential weapons”.
7. There are “large-scale voids” in critical surveillance.
 
This columnist has forewarned on regular doses of embarrassment in store from you. While you have written a letter directly to the PM, you have failed to implement instructions to record the alleged instance that a tout walked into your office and offered you Rs 14 crore in order to support the cause of “sub-standard” vehicles. Isn't it surprising that the defence minister told you complain formally but you didn't?

From a man willing to bare his heart out to the prime minister, is it too much to ask:
 
1. Why are you speaking about the incidents now, when this seems to have happened several months, if not years, back? Are you are really that much of a bechara, a fauji incarnate of character actor AK Hangal, perpetually beset with tuberculosis, coughing his way through the tearjerker? From your latest insubordination act, you seem only part that, part the rebuffed-by-the-damsel Prem Chopra, ready to burn the house down.

2. Whoever you really are, pray why did you not exercise your knowledge of due processes and conduct rules to take proactive action against the tout, the Lt Gen in question, rather than doing what you stated in the interview, that is, walk down to the defence minister’s office, bare your heart out, and then leave it to that?

3. Was it not your duty, as head of a professional army of this size and reputation, to string the tout, record the communication in writing, initiate a proper enquiry, and then, of course, inform the defence minister/defence secretary what was going on?

4. Read between the lines, The Hindu interview (and your somewhat strange choice of television media) alludes that the concerned tout has retired from the army. It is reasonable to assume therefore that the suspect was accountable to elaborate conduct rules for defence pensioners? Why didn't you get him by the goat? Why do you claim you were so shocked, the conversation froze you into such an innocent lamb?  By letting the matter slip out of your hands, did you, as army chief, therefore let a pensioner get away with gross professional misconduct? Why? Was it because the tout was in cohorts with other decision makers? Was it that you expected brownie points for compassion? Or was it that by an oral debrief you wished to wash off your moral conscience and were hopeful of a benign view from the arms mafia on your ultimate war, the case of getting your date of birth shifted from 1950 to 1951?

5. The purpose of baring your heart out to Vidya Subramanium of The Hindu and Santosh Bhartiya of Chauthi Duniya seemed premeditated. No two journalists could have extracted an identical “exclusive” narrative from you. Did you coach them or tip them off rather than respond to their queries? I first thought The Hindu quoted your off-the-record gripe typical to senior public officials, a case in point being K Natwar Singh when he scored a self-goal speaking to Barkha Dutt. But from your Bhartiya interview, there was no subterfuge on the interviewer’s part; you obviously had a clear message in your mind. The “terms” of this advance briefing would be known to the army chief’s PR department and the concerned friends at The Hindu/Chauthi Duniya. They have not violated any moral arrangement, you are no longer in a position to deny this part of the interview.

Are you entitled to indulging in slander reflective of your angst against the government? As a citizen or as a minor official, you certainly were. But not as army chief. By saying what you have, you have served the government a censure notice. And now that you have, why should you continue to expect the confidence of the supreme commander? Shouldn’t you quit rather than make these delayed claims while still in uniform?

6. What, by the way, did you do about the “sub-standard” vehicles that your boys are saddled with? Was it not your duty to have grounded them and blacklisted the manufacturer? Is this reflected on the file? What about the dhobi list of obsolescence you have shot off now?

7. From your record in recent months, you are unlikely to quit by yourself. But the fact remains that you've given sufficient evidence in the interview that you're a loose cannon. You have already hinted at more skeletons in the cupboard. Will the government suffer the ignominy? Or will it fire you?

My fear is that this government, led as it is purely by a survival instinct, is too confused to take a decisive step. But in the miraculous situation that it has nothing to hide, it should start by placing you in the exalted company of one Admiral Vishnu Bhagwat.
 
Tail Piece: If your job falls vacant before May 31, the chain of command among the present army commanders will be affected and a lieutenant general other than the one selected for your job can make a case for reconsideration. Let’s hope that happens. I'm sure even you don't want Lt Gen Bikram Singh to be your successor.
 
What Pakistan and China have been unable to do, you, in your frustration/impotence and delusions, are achieving in the 8.5 weeks of tenure you still have. It is frustrating for young Indians to see the twitter hashtag: #dramebaaz about India’s army chief. Is this the office Filed Marshal Sam Manekshaw held?